Worried Writers

While agents and editors can lay it all out in their blogs and say pretty much anything, writers have to think about getting readers and followers and fans who will buy their books-- thus we are nice and pleasant. As I wrote about here. After all, we're writers, we hate rejection. Our entire careers are based on avoiding it.

Have you ever wanted to post something but feared going too far? Do you ever hold back thinking, "Better not say that. People who matter might get upset. What if AN AGENT reads this"?

I used to read a book to my kids called Worried Walrus, and when anyone in our family got excessively worried about something, we'd say they were a worried walrus. I think sometimes we writers are worried walruses, afraid of saying, doing or writing the wrong thing to hurt our chances at publication, attracting readers, or achieving success in our careers.

Yesterday I read a post that was brutally honest in expressing what the industry has done to this writer's head since she began. I won't summarize but you can go here to read it yourself if you haven't already. Altho many have looked up to Natalie Whipple as having it all-- the dream agent *no longer in the business*, an editor at a dream publisher who loved her story *didn't work out*, and now still out on submission *where many would kill to be*-- still, the entire process put her through hell and back until she had to pour it all out on her blog.

And as she wrote it I'll bet you anything she worried about saying "too much"--about sounding whiny or ungrateful, about offending someone in the industry, perhaps alienating her blog readers. But she had to let it out, so she wrote the post and struck a chord, getting a zillion comments.

Let's pretend there'd be no repercussions if you wrote a post like Natalie's. What would be on it? What would you say about the industry? What's on your worried walrus writer list?

The Secret to Getting Published

What it's not:

• Having an idea no one's ever used before. (There's no such thing. Shakespeare saw to that and Dickens took care of whatever Shakespeare might have missed.)

• Being famous or related to someone famous. (It might get you noticed but there's got to be some talent to back it up. Still, they might put your face & name on a ghost written book, if you're really famous.)

• Writing the perfect query. (Be natural, be normal not needy and let your story speak for itself. There is no perfect query format. Even if there were, and you write it, how many query letters do you see for sale at Borders?)

• Getting the busiest and best-looking agent on the internet. (That one who looks like Tom Cruise comes to mind.)

• Getting a degree in creative writing. (Helpful, since hours of creative writing are required to get said degree.)

• The result of a highly popular blog with tons of followers. (Notwithstanding the scene in Julie Julia where 6 dozen agents leave pleading messages on her voice mail.)

Although if you have achieved any of the above points, you are fortunate indeed, (especially if you have that agent who looks like Tom Cruise). And you are definitely farther along the path to publication than the guy next door who says he's writing a novel but spends all his time on the Wii.


Then what is the secret to getting published? Come closer and I'll tell you. Are you ready for this?



You have to want it more than you want anything else. You must want it with every fibre of your being.



The rest of the secret:

• You will need to give up stuff to write. Lots of stuff. Like maybe, free time and all the fun things you see other people doing. Be responsible and prioritize (especially if you have young children). But make time to write.

• Writing well isn't easy or fast. It's a long, slow slog into awfulness involving disappointment, discouragement, depression and all those other "d" words until you begin to see a bit of light at the end of the tunnel. Be prepared for the long haul.

• Never quit until your prose sparkles and jumps off the page, until your characters come to life and your story strikes a universal chord. You may have to write six novels (like Talli Roland did) before you finally write the one that's got IT. Or spend ten years on one manuscript until it becomes a novel worth publishing. (Hello Uncut Diamonds.)

• Seek out and research every agent, every publisher, every avenue to publication that you can find. Don't be a publishing snob, thinking that only the best will do. A small press or an unknown and/or less attractive agent may offer you a contract and provide invaluable experience with editing, publishing and marketing.Your book could be on store shelves while your friend who snagged that extremely good-looking much busier agent is still waiting for an offer.

• If, after extensive research, you choose to self-publish or epublish, you won't rush into it with a poor quality piece of work. Nor cut corners on editing, design and typesetting, because you know that, in the end, it means nothing unless  readers (who are not your relatives) willingly shell out cash for your book.

• One finished manuscript or one published book is only the beginning. This is a career not a hobby. Never rest on any hard-won success. Celebrate then get back to it. Your best work may not yet be written.

• You might get lucky and hit the big time fast, but then what? Keep going. And going. Stephen King wrote On Writing after an accident that nearly killed him. He was in so much pain he could barely write for thirty minutes at a time-- a man with countless bestsellers to his name and plenty of money-- yet he did not stop writing.

There it is people. The secret to getting published. Go after it!

Prayers of the Psychotic Writer (which would be all of us)

Regardless of where you are in your writerly journey, I bet you have offered up, or shouted out, one of these prayers.

Prayers to begin your journey:

How do I know if I have talent? Stephen King says #1 requirement for a writer is talent. Am I deluding myself? DO I HAVE ANY TALENT?

A novel is 50,000 words? Where will I ever find the time to write 50,000 words? Do publishers accept flash fiction?

What should I write anyway? What's selling these days? I'm not interested in reading YA paranormal romance, how am I supposed to write it?

Prayers to accompany you along the way:

With so many writers out there, how will I ever stand a chance of getting published? Never mind-- I'll write a book and worry about that part later.

I finished my first draft! 57,000 words, typewritten, double-spaced, 305 pages. Now who can I bribe to read it and tell me if it's any good?

How do I find an agent?

Maybe I need a writing class. Should I be taking a writing class?

Are you even listening here? Or are you too busy answering all of Stephanie Meyers' prayers?

Next step:

Holy Crap! How do you write a query letter?

I've been rejected by 95 agents. What now? What now? What now?

Is it my query? Is it my manuscript? Is it my personality or lack thereof?

How does anyone get published? This is too hard! What next? Do I have any talent or am I just kidding myself?

(Don't go back to Step One Prayers! Must not slide backwards, must move forward!)

Finally getting an agent prayer:

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After two years with said agent and still no publisher:

Did I pick the wrong agent? Was I too eager? Should I have queried for another 6 months and gotten more offers?

Does my agent know what he's doing? Does he have my best interests at heart?

How long can I ride this "I've got an agent" train? I better get a publisher pretty soon or I'll lose all my street cred. Why doesn't anyone want me?

Do I have any talent?

After getting a publishing contract:

thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

While in editing:

Omigosh this is hard! Will this never end? It's been a year and my editor is still sending me back revisions! Does she even know what she's doing?

Is she trying to change my entire story? Is this the right publisher for me? Does my agent have my best interests at heart?

Will my book EVER see the light of day????

Do I have any talent?

Once the book is published and in author's hands:

thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After book has been out a few months:

Will it sell? Will anyone like it? Is this the right font? The cover looks funny. Does the publisher know what they're doing?

Aaargh, did you see that review? I want to kill myself!! How could anyone write that? Don't they even GET IT??? What if everyone hates my book? What if it doesn't sell? Will any publisher ever want to work with me again?

DO I HAVE ANY TALENT??

Best-selling author, on New York Times Besteller List, super-star celebrity:

How will I ever top this one? What should I write next? What if it's not as good? How will I hold my head up if it's a flop?

Will my readers still love me if I try out a different genre? There's so much pressure now, aargh I can't stand it!!

Who will they get to write the film script? What if I don't like it? What if the film flops? And why hasn't Oprah called?

Now, dear readers, where do you find yourself along this journey of anguished prayers? (It's just a thought question: no need to answer if it's too personal!!)

Why You May Not be Published

Serious wanna-be-published-more-than-anything writers must look at the quest for publication like they are  unemployed looking for a job. This article taken from US News & World Report is modified only slightly to meet your current publishing needs.

7 Unknown Reasons You’re not Getting Hired Published

1. You have unreasonable expectations. Everybody wants the perfect job agent, publisher, editor, spouse, car, home, vacation condo, body shape, whatever. But if your criteria are too high, if you're being too demanding, you may well remain unemployed unpublished. Nobody wants to be told to compromise, but the fact is that much of life involves just that, at least temporarily. Analyze your wants and needs. Which are must haves? Which are negotiable? Which can be put on hold?

2. You're relying too much on one search technique. Maybe you are only applying online sending out the same query to everyone, or only networking polishing without submitting or only using employment agencies  submitting to the top six, or only approaching companies agents that you know are hiring accepting submissions. Don't limit yourself to just one job agent/editor search method. Try them all. Cast a wide net, continue to build your connections, get creative.

3. You use the word "I" too often in your cover letter. The most effective way to endear yourself to potential employers  publishers is to put the focus more on them than on you. Show you've done your homework and understand what your target companies kind of books they are publishing. Then tell them how you can fill those needs.

4. You are not demonstrating long-term potential. We get caught up in the moment. We need a job to be offered a contract now. But employers agents and publishers, the good ones at least, tend to think long term. They want to know not only how you will contribute what you have written now but what you’ll be writing in the future, too. That "Where do you see yourself in five years?"  "What's your genre and what else have you got?" question is not just for drill. They really want to know.

5. You are unknowingly repeating mistakes. After interviews rejections, are you taking the time to review and analyze them? Many times the reason you don't get a job  a contract is beyond your control, and, in fact, has nothing to do with you, but not always. Trying to understand why the answer was "No" may help you to fine tune your approach.

6. You have not rehearsed no pitch or promotion plan. You may hesitate to rehearse answers to the most common questions. You don't want to sound canned. You want to be yourself. But consider the benefits of creating great answers to those questions you hear the most (what’s your book about? What makes it different from all the rest? Who's your demographic? How will you promote?)--short, vivid, three-sentence answers brimming with examples and facts--and practicing them until you can speak with conviction and confidence.

7. You put your job search writing on hold while waiting to hear back. Don't we all fall into this trap at one time or another? You've had a super couple of interviews emails with your dream employer agent. You just know you're going to get "the call" any day now. You think, I'm going to hold off until I hear back; after all, I deserve a little break. Well, no doubt you do deserve a little break--but don't. Keep on networking writing, applying submitting, interviewing attending writer conferences and researching agents & publishers until you have a firm job contract offer in hand.

Looking for work a publisher is an enormous project. In many ways it's more difficult, and takes more energy, than even the most demanding job writing the damn novel. So, in the midst of it all, find a way to nurture yourself. Keep on fine tuning and strengthening your approach manuscript. And hang in there.

With thanks and apologies (please don’t sue me) to:

Karen Burns is the author of the illustrated career advice book The Amazing Adventures of Working Girl: Real-Life Career Advice You Can Actually Use, recently released by Running Press. She blogs at www.karenburnsworkinggirl.com

What's your dream? Can you see it?

I believe in visualizing, imagining, dreaming. We cannot realize it unless we first visualize it. Can you see yourself submitting a complete manuscript to an agent or editor? Can you visualize an acceptance email or a phone call? Can you see your book in print, see people handing over money to purchase a copy? Can you imagine a room filled with strangers coming to hear you talk about your book?

Okay, stop right there, because yes, I'll be honest, that is my current visualization. The last presentation I went to, someone in the audience asked me, "What goals have you set for your writing? What is it you want?"

I knew the answer as soon as he said it. My response: "I want to see a room like this filled to capacity." It was a large conference room at a library, full of chairs, with three short rows occupied. In my mind's eye, I could see it full. Standing room only.

It's what I want. I visualize a room full of strangers coming to hear me talk (about my red shoes lol) and to buy my books. I added, "And then I want to go on Oprah!" This got a laugh and one lady said, "You'd better wear those red shoes of yours when you go on Oprah." Hooray, she was visualizing it, too! The more people you can get to share your dream, the more powerful it is.

That's me, what do you want? You're on a path to something-- what is it? And in your mind's eye, how far ahead can you see yourself on that path?

Seven Self-defeating Author Attitudes

I was given this award by beautiful bloggers Niki and Brigid.


But I'm cheating on the rules and instead of saying seven interesting things about my dull self, I am listing seven self-defeating attitudes for authors. Because you are all beautiful writers and need to not think any of these things, because it won't help your career goals one bit if you do:

>1. I can't take rejection. (Yes, you can. And you will. Again and again and again. If you want to be an author, you gotta pay the dues!)

2. There are too many books out there already. I have nothing new to offer. (That's crap. Yes, you do. Stop it. Want a little cheese with your whine?)

3. I won't submit a query or a promotional plan with my first three chapters. My writing speaks for itself. (An agent or editor likes to know the person they're going to get into bed with for the next how many years. That cover letter introduces you. Make it good. And a savvy promotional plan shows that you understand your market and how to reach it.)

4. Any agent is better than no agent at all. (Absolutely untrue. Would you say that any lawyer is better than no lawyer at all? Like if you were facing a murder rap? Do your research.)

5. Any press that takes unagented submissions is out to get the author. (A small press can be an excellent way to break into the market. They accept unagented submissions because they pay small or no advances, and agents won't go there. Doesn't mean they are unsavory. Trust your instincts. If you've done your research and carefully reviewed the contract, and feel like it's fair, it probably is.)

6. "POD" means the same as "small print run." (POD means print-on-demand, and is used when the title is intended largely for internet sales, not bookstore sales. A small print run means the publisher isn't sure how the book will do in the marketplace and so they don't want to risk printing 10,000 copies to sit in the distributor's warehouse.)

7. It's not my job to promote my books. That's up to the publisher. (Who are you? Ernest Hemingway? This isn't the Forties-- get out there and twitter.)

I could have come up with way more than 7, but I'm going with the blog award idea. Now I pass it along to these beautiful bloggers who I always enjoy reading:

Ellen at Pink Tea and Paper whose post today unlocked the pages icon for me.

Dominique at En Violet who is always clever and thoughtful in her posts.

Barbara at My Kitchen Table, who already got it but is so interesting I want to know more.

Pat Tillett who writes incredible snippets of his fascinating life.

Steena Holmes at Chocolate Reality who has awesome shoes & lipstick with the chocolate blog.